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Diary

In this category are all the diary's of the different users of the site.

These past few weeks have been extremely hard. I'll wake up with my heart racing, or the littlest things will set my anxiety off. I feel stupoid because I can't control it and don't know how. The worse the anxiety attack is the more I feel like I want to hurt myself to make it all end to just make the pain go away for alil while. I have extremely bad problems with feeIng like a fuck up or I'm not good enough for anybody. My boyfriend and girlfriend are really supportive, but sometimes he acts like I'm just to much in my feelings. It has nothing to do with that and everything to do with the things stuck in my head. Sometimes!as I wish things could just go back to the way they were or that I could just disappear for awhile and would anyone even notice.
I'm 28 years old and have anxiety. I recently moved to Virginia with myt boyfriends girlfriend and the kids. I've always had issues  with my self esteem becausw off my mother, but since moving its gotten a lot worse. Doesn't help me ands my boyfriends work together so we never are away from each other and I feel like we've lost our old relationship. My mom has gotten a lot worse and as of now we havnt been talking. You see I starters cracking around last October. I started feeling like I was a fuck up and nobody wanted me. Id think about killing myself and then have dreams about it. By thanksgiving I was calling my parents ands asking them to come get me. They did but I never made it out of Virginia. I wanted to go back to my man because I knew leaving him wasn't the problem. I started going to a counselor soon after that and after a couple sessions I found out I have ADHD and anxiety. I've been put on medicine, but can't…
Hello, it's me. I was just diagnosed about a year ago, right after a horrible broken heart and after I lost one of my childhood pets. I knew for awhile that I had some issues, but it wasn't until I got diagnosed that I actually realized how bad my depression and anxiety really is. I have been going through some rough battles lately; my mom almost lost her house, I've been struggling at college to make friends and to keep my grades up (in high school I was a straight A student) trying to find a job but not hearing anything back from any establishment that I have turned in an application for, and much more. I am not sure how much longer I can try to make myself feel better.  I have been on pills to help for almost a year. The first pills that I took made me feel even worse; I had horrible nightmares and was having suicidal thoughts, which never happened before. I started some new pills about 5 months ago and they are working better…
I don't think I have written in a diary since I was probably 12 years old. I grew up in South America. I saw so many things a child should never see. This caused some PTSD but I had no clue until I was an adult. I've struggled with anxiety for as long as I can remember. it was always manageable except for a brief time in my very early 20s. And now I'm 30 and having the most severe panic attacks I have ever had. It's hard to tell what triggered them. The migraines that all of a sudden started happening? Oh no! I must have an aneurism or a mass in my brain! … panic attack… or maybe it was when my blood work came back with high cholesterol? Oh no! I'm gonna have a heart attack any second now! I have to stop eating! I'm so hungry but I don't want to die!!… panic attack… chest is tight fingers tingling. That's it! I'm about to die!! … panic attack… and nobody understands. And I'm told it's all…
Why is journaling important? “A journal is a place where we give expression to the fountain of our heart, where we can unreservedly pour out our passion before the Lord.” – Donald S Whitney, from Spiritual Disciplines for the Christian Life Journaling has many benefits, many of which make for a healthy mind and soul. You could use journaling to help with a number of life situations, but I’m specifically speaking to the benefits when dealing with depression and anxiety. The act of literally writing out thoughts and feelings allow us to process and better understand them. This can help resolve difficult situations and conflicts we encounter in life, as well as help when faced with a difficult decision to make.  When writing we are often able to get out the why, how, who, what, of a thought or problem. It let’s us get the thoughts and feelings out of our minds and out on a page, a page that will not judge us. Once the manic thoughts are written down, our brains can think more clearly about a situation. It is…
I will admit I am addicted to beautiful notebooks and journals! There is something wonderful about a nicely designed notebook that sucks me in every time. That is why I don’t hold myself to having just one journal. I still have my journal from when I was a child and still use my one from college today. I’d have to say my college one is my favorite. And I will tell you why – It’s now my journal to record all the major accomplishments and blessings in my life. It’s a time capsule documenting those moments that I have felt my happiest. Having a journal like this is perfect for when you have a very down day. You can take some moments to flip through it, reflecting on all the good things you have done. It’s important to have them captured to help remind you how awesome you are when you are having a hard time reminding yourself. This journal has been through some tough times and I’m continuously taping it together. But that is why I love it. It…
My name is Jessica Adanich. I was born and raised in Northeast Ohio. I have two amazing parents, Susan and Emery Adanich, who helped me become the person I am today. I’m an artist, designer, author, daughter, friend, bunny mom, lego enthusiast, fish owner, knitting guru, ocean obsessed, shark lover, gardening newbie, twenty-nine year old female. I also battle with depression and anxiety. In today’s world many people feel if they have depression and/or anxiety (D&A) they are defective, non-human beings. Of course, this is part of their depression speaking but also partly how our society looks at people who declare they have depression. Slowly as a whole, we are beginning to realize this isn’t true. Most people you would never expect to have such issues actually do. And most times unfortunately, those people are spending a lot of energy trying to hide it and battle it by themselves. I think since I have published Journal+ and began telling my story; I’m finally starting to feel free. It’s incredibly exhilarating to finally give yourself permission to be truly you. I…
Well I am new on anxietysocialnet.com. It captured my attention because I have recently returned online for anxiety help. I have suffered from anxiety pretty much all my life however it really started affecting me when I was 11. Between 11-18, I didn't understand that what I was going through was anxiety. I am thankful I had a mom who saw that I did get anxious and she would hug me, and we would cite verses or quotes that helped me in my situation. My anxiety was a little more predictable back then, like I knew I was always anxious in the mornings, then extremely anxious for a test, or if I saw my crush. Which are completely normal things to get nervous for. However, my anxiety was worse because I would feel like I was dying, couldn't breathe, and I would shake profusely.  Jump forward to now. I am 26 and I still suffer from anxiety. The doctor informed me that my anxiety is at a High/Severe level back in 2012. I have months where it is worse and some…
My mind is like a ticking bomb, I never know when it will go off. It decides when to strike, where to strike and how hard. My mind has exploded for the 3rd time today. This bomb will set off at the triggers I cannot see. They know when to strike next sometimes it happens multiple times in a day and it hinders my ability to function as a normal person. I can no longer be able to just rely on the medication given to me, for it does not work like it usually does. It can suprees it some days or cause less attacks to happen, but it hasnt been able to subside those feelings I have inside anymore. I used to be able to keep what I am feeling at bay and hide it and fight it through thick and thin, but now all it does is get stronger and I cant live this way anymore. I cant funtion on my own I rely on the ones  that are closest to me to keep my head above water.…
This is the second "episode" of this.  Growing up, my father was the one who was the person who worked for everything and gave us everything we needed. My "mother" was the one who was addicted to gambeling and did not work, got government funding when it was not needed and even lied on the forms she filled out so she was able to get them. She cheated on my father many times which I found out later when I was older and him and I talked that he knew about, and he simply put that aside and stayed together for my sister and I.  That is an amazing person, a selfless person. Someone who I strive to be and I try to be. I never bring up my issues and the things I am going through so  I can help the ones that are around me, I come second.  My father was the same way and he commited suicide in 2004 at just 47 years old. He is my hero, he showed me what it is to be a…

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