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Dating tips?

My anxiety has always got the better of me when its come to dating. This is quite embarrassing to talk about but I could do with a few tips. Basically i'm 25, have never had a relationship, been on dates or anything. I have managed in the past to ask women out but have always been rejected. These days if I meet someone that I seem to like, I always back out of asking them out right before doing so because the voice inside my head is telling me that theres no point because i'll just get rejected again. It almost feels like im destined to be alone, but I want to keep trying in the hope that i'll find someone. So if anyone has any tips on how I could successfully do this, that would be great.
Category: Anxiety 7 years ago
TeenageMutantNinjaJoey
Asked 7 years ago

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Try removing the word "date" from your vocabulary and thought process. If you find someone who has similar interests just mention " ya know, we should really check that (movie or concert) out." It's not a "date", its two friends going out to have a goodtime.
LAE
Answered 7 years ago
LAE

I would have to agree with LAE, there's something about the word "date" that's scary. "Date" implies this stereotyped, formal behavior...it should be about getting to know the person and having fun while doing it, not worrying about etiquette. (Although it's important, but I understand that it gets in the way sometimes) As for actual tips....I'm just understanding the whole process myself (it's taken awhile...haha) so I'm no expert. BUT I know that it's a struggle for most everyone here--you're definitely not alone. Everyone has those fears of rejection it seems, but confidence is something we can all work on. I guess the first step would be to be okay with yourself, to look yourself in the mirror and say "Ok, I DO have certain faults, but I ALSO have many personal strengths that I can share with someone"...and figure out what those are. Think about those strengths whenever you fear rejection, and remind yourself that no one is perfect, we are all bound to screw up at some point....so why not just take the risk?
JessicaLF
Answered 7 years ago
JessicaLF

i definitely agree not to specify that it's a date. just ask them to hang out and do whatever but don't make it necessarily a romantic endeavor. just spend some time with them and see where things go. the less pressure you put on it the better the outcome will be. and if you stop looking girls tend to come to you. people are more interested in what they can't have than what is given to them. also with the rejection thing just make your goal to ask them. if you see a girl and want to go race go karts with her and you set that as your goal she may say no for whatever reason and then you'll be disappointed but if your goal is simply to ASK her to go race go karts with you then no matter what she says to you you can tell yourself you succeeded because all you planned to do was ask her and the outcome from there was irrelevant
Tyler Durden
Answered 7 years ago
Tyler Durden

It sounds like everyone above has pretty much nailed it.. to call it a "date" comes with expectations... just say something like "would you like to go out and (fill in the blank) - movie, meal, hang out, etc... sometime".. and if the person says no... then it is their loss in choosing to not get to know you, and they aren't worth a second thought... asking is the key step.. just be relaxed and be yourself...
Ryche
Answered 7 years ago
Ryche

I'm not in any way Christian, but [url=http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationships/how-should-christians-date]this article[/url] was extremely helpful to me. I'm not going to say any more about it because it's in the same vein as above. (That being said, I've still been too scared to really initiate anything).
let_me_try_this
Answered 7 years ago
let_me_try_this

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