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I suffer from fear of public transportation, i.e busses, coaches, taxi's, trains, aeroplanes, and long journeys, and I was wondering if anyone else here suffers similar experiences from what I am about to write from bellow: I don't know how or why it started but I sure remember when. One of my ex girlfriends and i had a long distance relationship. We lived about four hours away from each other and we would both take it in turns to take the train to one another's houses and stay for a while. I was I think 14/15 years of age and had been suffering from severe depression and severe anxiety since I will say the age of 11 as that was when I was first officially diagnosed although I have always been an anxious person. Anyway, this one day it was my turn to take the train up to hers and for a while now the anxiety had been building on these journeys every time, and on this particular day something felt different, shall I say. I had boarded on to the train and I could see my Dad standing on the platform outside of my window and I suddenly just went berserk. I shouted through the window to my Dad, "I can't do this", and suddenly desperately needed the toilet and was hyperventilating, pouring with sweat, shaking uncontrolably, and I couldn't even talk! After i had been to the toilet about 10 times, I had been throwing up blood and blood was coming out from my behind also and suddenly everything went dark. I later woke up on the floor of the carriage of the train by the ticket guy and he called for help and I was taken off at the next station. I was so embarrassed and ashamed, I had to call my dad who luckily had not left the station after i had shouted to him "I can't do this" and came to get me straight away. I had to be taken to the hospital and get checked over etc, all to discover that I had IBS..? When I was a kid and would go on school trips, I never wanted to, i was too afraid but I was still made to go, and i would always throw up - embarrassing and shameful yet again for me and I would experience levels of anxiety but not to the level of the story up above. After that experience on the train, I tried going on to a bus. I had paid for my seat and the bus was about to set off, and I suddenly ran off the bus shouting to the driver to open the doors and let me off. And once again I was very embarrassed and ashamed. I had also tried to go on long journeys in the car back to my hometown, London, UK, Bournemouth where my auntie and cousin live, and other long journeys but that also got too much for me to bear. Every time I got anxious I would suddenly need the toilet without warning and would have to get my Dad or whoever was driving to pull over immediately in fear that I would soil myself. And now, at the age of 22, I still suffer from this. Even when I'm not going on a journey, as soon as I become anxious, I need the toilet immediately. My friends don't know about this at all, only my current girlfriend and my parents do. So when my friends ask me to go on a journey with them somewhere, I have to make up an excuse and lie to them. I hate having to do that. It has happened a lot when being in the car with my girlfriend going on a journey somewhere. Twice I have been in tears in the car because I thought I was about to soil myself. In my personal opinion of myself, and no one else, i feel that as a 22 year old man, I should not be suffering with this. I constantly tell myself "you know, you're not a kid, you're a grown man so start acting like one", and all other kinds of things. I am my own worst enemy at times, I do self sabotage a lot. I actually can't believe i'm writing this for all to see, but I need to know that I'm not alone and need any advice anyone can give me.