every couple of weeks, i have an intense fear that i'm a pedophile. i've talked to a therapist about this, who said that it was definitely intrusive thoughts (pure OCD w/out compulsions) and that the fact i haven't ever acted inappropriately with a child means that, odds are, i'm not a pedophile. i still can't shake the feeling though. the thought of oral sex with a young child literally forces itself into my head. i honestly don't know if i'm disgusted by the idea or not, even though i'm in a committed relationship with an adult (have been for years) and don't feel like this all the time, only every few weeks or even months/years. on days when i do think about it, suicide definitely presents itself as an option. i'm honestly not sure what my next step is, and i really need some honest guidance/help. thanks!